If I had had the idea before I posted part 1, I might have sub-titled this series of posts something like Really, Just a Dirty Book About Road Trip. I did not. It's too late to change now.
The Cook's Tale: Involves a prostitute. That's all I know. It's all anyone knows, (except, presumably, the Cook) because the mere mention of the prostitute offends the others so much that he isn't allowed to continue with his story, thus disqualifying him from the competition
Did I even mention they are having a competition? I don't think I did. They are having a competition (SURPRISE!) to see who can tell the best story. (I also could have subtitled this series Dirty Book About a Roadtrip Meets The X-Factor). The prize is a free dinner. Come to think of it, did I even mention they are on a road-trip? I don't think I did that either. Sorry. You probably knew anyway, but if you didn't, they are on a road-trip. To Canterbury.
A tavern landlord, who only came along for the ride at the last minute when they all met in his pub the night before, is the Simon Cowell figure. He's in charge of deciding who will win, and no one can argue with him or they have to pay the travel expenses of the entire party for the entire trip. Given there are thirty pilgrims in the party, each on a horse, you don't need to be that good at maths to work out that arguing with the landlord isn't a financially viable option. Even if you won the free dinner, you'd be a lot worse off than if you'd just kept your big mouth shut. The cook doesn't complain. Maybe he just doesn't like pub-grub much and didn't really care about the prize any way, or maybe he'd done the maths. Either way, we don't get to hear his story.
I had planned to tell you about the Man of Law's tale today as well, but I am meant to be going out and am already way late. I will save it for tomorrow (I have written up about half of it and don't want to leave you with TWO unfinished tales in the one day) but while you are waiting, here is a picture clue:
Make that, here is where a picture clue WOULD be, if my computer hadn't decided to pick this moment, of all moments, to stop co-operating. Stupid, stupid computer. It won't let me upload it. Sorry; if it helps to know, it was going to be a reptile with a woman's face for a head. Now not only am I seriously late, but I am going to have to explain to the friends I'm meeting that searching for and then not being able to upload a picture of a reptile with a woman's face for a head is the reason. I am not looking forward to that conversation at all.
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